there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
