thus making me awesome and them whores
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize