I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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