I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
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