Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
At least life still wants to fuck me.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
