Heybabeimwearingurpanties
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
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