I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
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