well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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