i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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