im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
