I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
