that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
