The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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