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So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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