what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
You ever have a fart follow you around?
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
