can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
