somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Randomize
