You're so nebulous sometimes
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
