been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Randomize
