So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
