after a month anything with tits is on the radar
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Randomize
