Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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