she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Randomize
