Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
he was CRYING into my vagina
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I need to calm my uterus...
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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