It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
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