Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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