She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
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