I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
