I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Randomize