I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Randomize
