i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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