Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Randomize