Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Randomize
