but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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