He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize