it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
