At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
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