oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Randomize
