I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Randomize
