Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize
