he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
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