He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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