If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
Randomize
