so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Randomize
