He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
Need sex. Gaining weight.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize
