Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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