Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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