Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize
