oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
