I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize